My mission, and I chose to accept it

Our boy is turning 2 and we decided to have a celebration. Nothing crazy, just some friends and a BBQ. With nearly an acre for the kids to play on. An acre now relatively mowed after I accepted the emasculating reality that I cannot keep that much lawn in check with a push mower and got someone in to do it.

I was to be BBQer in chief. But that was not enough involvement for me. All dads BBQ, so what? No. I decided to do something else as well….

The Dadinator walks into the saloon. Surrounded by thugs, highwaymen and murderers. He casts his eye across the tables, squinting. He pauses for a moment and waits as the room goes silent. “I’m here to bake a cake” he yells across the smoke-filled den of thieves. The piano crashes to a stop. Every jaw drops, every mouth inhales sharply and the silence deepens. “Did he just say he’s baking a cake?” Someone whispers. The barkeep over-pours the drink on the bar. “You heard me, I’m here to bake a cake!”

Okay, the conversation actually went like this “We should bake him a birthday cake” I said, looking blankly into the distance, my mind caught up in a crazy idea. “Yeah.” Said the Mamantor. “Hey!” I exclaimed as my eyes widened in excitement “I could bake it!”. “Yeah. If you want” she replied. “Wow, I could make my sons birthday cake…” I said lost in the craziness of the scheme I had just concocted, as if saying I was going to invent the first aeroplane.

So. The task was set. But what cake? TO THE INTERNET! I thought to myself. I looked at cheese cakes. At gluten free cakes. At decorated butter cakes. I had to take into account the fact that I draw about as well as a epileptic drunken cane toad, so nothing intricate, and no piping or decorating. Also, I would not have much uninterrupted kitchen time, so nothing too complicated. I also had to remember it was a cake for a kids party.

After some procrastination masquerading as soul searching I decided: Rainbow cake. It was partly because of a friend of mine who featured on “The Great Australian Bake Off” (Hi SJ!), and partly because our kid likes rainbows. Seriously, he saw his first one a couple of weeks ago, and keeps on demanding that the sky brings them forth. The sky usually tells him to get stuffed. I had two options. Layers or a marble cake. Layers were unlikely given we only had 1 round baking tin in the house, so marble cake it was!

Saturday night was bake night. Kid needed to sleep fast so I could get it done, and bless him, he did. Fortunately the cake making part was actually made very easy because we own a Thermomix. The Mamanator sells these machines, and I am inserting a plug for her business here because I am a supportive, cake baking kind of husband. But seriously, it made life pretty easy. The fiddly part was colouring everything and bringing the cake together. Here’s my photo story of the event (imagine it as a montage set either to “eye of the tiger” or “montage”, if you know either of those songs.

So, how did it go? Went down a treat. And I got to feel proud of myself, and inflate my sense of self-importance (which was all part of the original objective of the exercise, in case you hadn’t noticed) Also made me feel useful because it turns out that the BBQ plan was kind of wrecked by the weather.

Oh, and our boy is suddenly 2 years old. How the #@)(%*$% did that happen? I swear he was born a few days ago. He used to look small, then we had The Lass. Suddenly this vivacious 13 kilos of running, talking mayhem has started to look very big indeed.

Happy Birthday son, I love you to bits. I’d ask you to stay this way forever, but then I’d never know what I was missing out on. It has been a awesome time in my life, and I thank you for it.

And to the Mamanator who gave birth to you and your sister, look at that thing. Look at that thing you grew inside you. You can even talk to it now. Amazing. Oh and I am so making your birthday cake this year….

And to the Lass, yes I’ll bake you a cake too….. Promise.